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Burton

Liftin' weights and other shit

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I did some deadlifts today.

 

1.  Deadlifts

 

Warmups:

  • 5 x 60 kg
  • 5 x 75 kg
  • 3 x 90 kg

Working:

  • 8 x 95 kg
  • 8 x 110 kg
  • 10 x 120 kg

BBB:

  • 10 x 75 kg x 5 sets

2.  Lat pulldown-Mag Wide Grip Handle

  • 10 x 32 kg
  • 10 x 36 kg
  • 10 x 40 kg
  • 10 x 45.5 kg
  • 10 x 50 kg

Too easy, should have started at 45.5

 

3.  T-Bar Row-Weight added to bar only

  • 10 x 20 kg
  • 10 x 35 kg x 4 sets

4.  Glue Ham Raises

 

I tried to do these and I honestly don't like the gym's GHR machines.  They're Rogue ones and I think they're inferior to EFTS ones so I only did one set of 5 due to issues with getting my feet in it and it having nowhere to stand on while putting my feet in it, I pussed out and gave up.

 

Overall, pretty good workout.  Nice to be back:

 

Couple notes:

 

  1.  I can't leave Jim Wendler, it's like I'm a battered spouse.
  2.  I wanted to switch it up and went with 8/6/3 for the rep targets.  I don't know how long I'll be able to keep pace, though.
  3.  I'm gonna plan on 6 weeks between deloads
  4.  Also, gonna really push for higher volume on my low weeks.  Maybe some more BBB sets or something.
    1. Today was around 7535 kg and I think that's a good start.  Next time around on my first week, I'd like to see if I could push that into 10 k+.  I think that would be good for me wrt conditioning and overall health
  5.  Need to start doing cardio again.  The bike is hard with the foot but I think I have to just work through it and do all the rehab stuff I can to keep myself functional enough to keep it up. 
    1. Next year, I am gonna look into that shock wave therapy stuff.  I've heard good things about it for PF but I need to look more into it to make sure it's not just quackery or bullshit with good marketing behind it.  It's supposed to be an option for people who have had it for at least 6 months.  I qualify for that but I'm not sure if they're gonna make me try a bunch of other options before jumping right into that.

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I did some bench Tuesday.  It wasn't super impressive but it was a thing.  

 

1.  Bench

 

Warmups:

  • 5 x 35 kg
  • 5 x 50 kg
  • 3 x 50 kg

Working:

  • 8 x 55 kg
  • 8 x 65 kg
  • 13 x 70 kg

Joker:

  • 7 x 75 kg

Only did one because I didn't like the amount of reps I got or how hard it felt.

 

BBB:

  • 10 x 45 kg x 5 sets

2.  Floor Press

  • 5 x 60 kg x 3 sets

I'm much weaker on these than I expected.  I used to able to get solid sets of 115 kg or so so wasn't quite expecting 60 kilos to kick my ass like that.  I had wanted 5 sets of 10 but got 3 of 5.  D'oh

 

3.  Straight Bar Pressdown

  • 10 x 27.5 kg
  • 10 x 32 kg
  • 10 x 36 kg
  • 10 x 41 kg
  • 10 x 45.5 kg
  • 9 x 50 kg

I started too low again.  I was wanting to do 3 sets of a pretty solid 10 then 2 sets I struggled with.  I should have started at 41 kg.

 

4.  Hammer Strength Incline

  • 8 x 25 kg x 3 sets

These hurt my shoulder pretty bad.  I'm gonna just go with incline press with neutral grip in the future.

 

5220 kilo of volume for bench isn't bad for me, more than I expected coming in.

 

I am feeling rough today so I'm gonna push squats back until tomorrow and press Saturday.  Taking off for the holidays on Sunday morning and will be back Monday night.  Gonna make next week a W-Th-F-Sa workout week so I should be hurting real good.  At least at the end of all this holiday shit, I will have my new really cool Garmin Fenix 5x watch.  Super excited for that and a thing I've wanted for a while so I'm happy my gf and our families went all together on it for me.  Those shits are crazy expensive for a person to just buy, hence why I have never had one.

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Been working out when I have time.  Gotten all my workouts in.

 

Squat was terrible and I felt weak and more importantly, out of shape.

 

OHP was bad, felt stiff.

 

Deadlifts last night was meh.  Only did up to my BBB sets and then left.

 

Hit all my rep targets +3 so that's good.

 

Christmas has been a big shit pile so I've been tired and stressed and the workouts have shown.  Our dog with cancer is in the final stages.  He went from fully functional last week to being about 1/2 step above paralyzed at the moment.  We still don't even know how or why.  We left him early afternoon Wednesday to go Christmas shopping and when we came back he was a disaster, totally different dog.  Over the weekend as we traveled with him, he's gotten progressively worse until where he's at now.

 

Has to have help to do everything, including being lifted up to eat and drink and is heavily medicated (4 painkillers).  Girlfriend is "processing it" but I'm guessing that we're down to our last few days with him before it's time to let him go.  It's a sad thing but I guess it's the nature of cancer in pets.  I'm having a really hard time with it.  Every time he has to go out we have to pick up his dog bed, carry him outside and roll him up onto his front legs, then put a sling under his back and help him stand up and walk him around.  She's off until the second of Jan and I don't know how I'm gonna be able to do this by myself when she's at work.

 

I feel at least somewhat like what we're doing is selfish to the point of near cruelty but I can't really address it due to her not handling it well at all.  I'm wrestling with whether or not I should have spoken up when we were at the vet.  It seems like we're not letting him have any dignity in his final days and that the humane thing wouldn't have been to say goodbye at the hospital.  Once again though, it's not my decision but I feel like I failed on some level for not having said my peace yesterday.

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The second my dog couldn't care for herself and required assistance in walking, I marched her to the vet. It's still the worst thing I've ever had to do, and it pains me deeply to this day, but it needed to be done. @Sanction remembers how badly I handled it, I'm sure. It's all part of "parenting", whether dog or child. Sometimes you need to make really hard decisions for the good of that little being you call 'yours'.

 

BTW, I'm totally not judging you, just presenting to you how we processed things over here when we were in a similar situation. 

 

Better to make a hard decision today, than to be regretting the opposite and feeling guilty or selfish down the road.

 

Keep going to the gym. It will help you cope.

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1 minute ago, Emperor G_D said:

The second my dog couldn't care for herself and required assistance in walking, I marched her to the vet. It's still the worst thing I've ever had to do, and it pains me deeply to this day, but it needed to be done. @Sanction remembers how badly I handled it, I'm sure. It's all part of "parenting", whether dog or child. Sometimes you need to make really hard decisions for the good of that little being you call 'yours'.

 

BTW, I'm totally not judging you, just presenting to you how we processed things over here when we were in a similar situation. 

 

Better to make a hard decision today, than to be regretting the opposite and feeling guilty or selfish down the road.

 

Keep going to the gym. It will help you cope.

1

 

Honestly, the gym is the only thing helping me cope at the moment.

 

It's a hard situation and I'd have made the same decision as you.  I would have probably made the decision to put him down yesterday but he's not really mine so it's not mine to make.

 

I just feel bad because I feel like I'm a party to this whole process.  Probably because I am.  It's hard for me to watch him like this.  His mind is fully aware.  And this is a dog that would do almost anything to avoid going to the bathroom in the house and you can actually see him feel bad if he did reduced to having to bark at us so we know when to carry him outside so he can struggle to go.  I don't like that I feel like we're robbing him of his dignity, even if that's a thing dogs can even feel.

 

And it makes me mad when I get up this morning and she talks about the "good" morning they had when all that had happened was he was lying on his bed in the exact same position I had put him in 3 and a half hours earlier.  Her sitting around feeding him treats while he can't move isn't really what I would consider "good" for him except in the sense that he gets treats.  He certainly can feel affection and happiness but I don't know that I would call it a life with any quality.

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9 minutes ago, Burton said:

 

Honestly, the gym is the only thing helping me cope at the moment.

 

It's a hard situation and I'd have made the same decision as you.  I would have probably made the decision to put him down yesterday but he's not really mine so it's not mine to make.

 

I just feel bad because I feel like I'm a party to this whole process.  Probably because I am.  It's hard for me to watch him like this.  His mind is fully aware.  And this is a dog that would do almost anything to avoid going to the bathroom in the house and you can actually see him feel bad if he did reduced to having to bark at us so we know when to carry him outside so he can struggle to go.  I don't like that I feel like we're robbing him of his dignity, even if that's a thing dogs can even feel.

 

And it makes me mad when I get up this morning and she talks about the "good" morning they had when all that had happened was he was lying on his bed in the exact same position I had put him in 3 and a half hours earlier.  Her sitting around feeding him treats while he can't move isn't really what I would consider "good" for him except in the sense that he gets treats.  He certainly can feel affection and happiness but I don't know that I would call it a life with any quality.

 

I just watched my wife's Best Friend's husband go through this as well. To me, all I saw in the photos of her on her bed and him next to her was the dog's pain and his resistance . I feel like I was rob bed of years with my girl, but I know that I saved her endless amounts of pain by making a fast decision in her exit. I saved my wife and I endless pain watching it all play out, too, because I remember the few awful days before our decision. They weren't good.

 

Hang in there, buddy. I'm sure this can't go on much longer before it's obvious to her.

 

 

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1 hour ago, Emperor G_D said:

 

I just watched my wife's Best Friend's husband go through this as well. To me, all I saw in the photos of her on her bed and him next to her was the dog's pain and his resistance . I feel like I was rob bed of years with my girl, but I know that I saved her endless amounts of pain by making a fast decision in her exit. I saved my wife and I endless pain watching it all play out, too, because I remember the few awful days before our decision. They weren't good.

 

Hang in there, buddy. I'm sure this can't go on much longer before it's obvious to her.

 

 

 

Im hoping she sees it soon too.

 

I hope we can get him free of his pain soon.

 

If this is some shit she drags into February or something equally ridiculous, I don't know if I'll ever actually be able to respect her again.

 

I respect what she's going through now because I know the pain and all that. I think she sees his pain but I worry when she says she's trying to process it that she's just playing mental gymnastics and semantic games to avoid admitting she's being selfish.

 

It's all muddied by him still being 100% lucid.

 

Anyway, not gonna dwell on this but thanks for the support.

 

And for what it's worth for everyone else, please don't hit me with "you have to convince her" "animal cruelty", blah blah blah.  I really don't need any of that shit on me right now.

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It's hard but tomorrow morning between 9 and 10 we're bringing an in home service here to take care of it.

 

I had pushed for today as we can no longer take him out.  It seems that his bladder and bowels are totally out of his control so we have no idea when/if he needs to go and he's in so much pain that even handling him is too hard on him.

 

She just needed another night of sleeping with him.  I have my opinions on it all, of course but tomorrow is better than some nebulous concept of a vague future date.

 

Anyway, enough of my personal shit.  I'm gonna try to get away later to the gym for bench press but who knows what that will bring.

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3 hours ago, Sanction said:

Sometimes I think little is more agonizing than encountering the suffering and oncoming death of our pets.

 

I certainly can't come up with anything more difficult during my life.  Which I suppose means I've lived a pretty charmed life but fuck if it doesn't hurt like hell.

 

I handle it way worse than a person dying.  I think there's something about the lack of hard communication.  I know Dozer is hurting and he's going to be not in pain anymore but the inability of him to say it's time to let go makes it hurt more than with a person who can tell you when they're ready.

 

I just wanna go outside and scream into the fucking sky and collapse into a big pile of emotions but I'm doing everything I can to keep myself steady for both her and him.

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Fuck, man. I'm not going to rehash what has already been said other than I feel for you and sometimes things like this bring us back to our raw humanity. I hope you do continue training through this as it really does ease the transition. You will gain something for working through this.

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We took care of it this morning and he was gone around 1025.

 

It was incredibly tough but I know he doesn't hurt anymore so that's a consolation in my mind.

 

Adrienne is hurting but it'll lessen over time.

 

I haven't left the house and slept for about 7 hours this afternoon and now I'm in bed.  Gonna go back to real life tomorrow but right now I just wanna be asleep

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Working out has been really tough to get to but I'm working on the diet.

 

As I mentioned in the chatbox, I'm going back to IF/leangains as it has had some degree of success for me when I follow it correctly.

 

Only issue I'm having is that I'm currently struggling to get in my required number of calories in  the 6 hr window.  Me, as a girthy, tall man, my caloric needs are quite high, around 3900 from his equation in the book.  Which is about right as my new garmin watch tells me about 5000 kcal/day from ~3100 bmr with another 1200-1900/day from activity, depending on the day.

 

So with that in mind, I'm going with 3400/day.

 

Only hangup I'm having is the whole 50-60% of calories from protein.  That works out to ~425 g/day.  Not that it's undoable, just hard.  Yesterday I ate a pound of breaded chicken twice with lots of broccoli, a bunch of cottage cheese, 3 scoop protein shakes x2 and a good bit of peanut butter.

 

Today I ate 18 oz of flat iron steak with veggies and cottage cheese for lunch, drank a huge protein shake and a bunch of peanut butter on rice cakes for a snack and I'm about to make ~16 oz of ground turkey with more cottage cheese and a glass of milk.  I think that'll get me near 400 g protein.

 

Anyway, that's a lot of food to shovel down in the 1230-630 time window.  I know it'll get easier within a couple of weeks but I'm struggling.  It's made harder by the fact that since Dozer's death, I have been erratic and unstable in my food intake in the first place.

 

I have some interesting job-related news but I"m not sure if it'll pan out or not.  I'll tell you all about it later when I get a few minutes.  Sam, if I make it happen, I'll be about 5 states away from stalking you so let's keep our fingers crossed for that I suppose.

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16 minutes ago, mwarren said:

I might stalk Sam for a week just to enjoy the weather and scenery. 

 

Aah, young sweet Michael with your pure motivations.

 

This is why you'll never be good at sex crimes.

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Hey, I've had sex with an unwanting partner before. I don't know if you could call it rape but I sure felt like I was being disrespectful. 

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13 hours ago, mwarren said:

Hey, I've had sex with an unwanting partner before. I don't know if you could call it rape but I sure felt like I was being disrespectful. 

 

I have more elaborate plans.  They involve chloroform, a cabin in the woods, time, reprogramming and eventually a happy new life.

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My back has been feeling fucky so that's not great.  Bent over to pick up a laundry basket on Thursday and has felt like butthole ever since.  But it feels like it's improving.  Going from not being able to bend at the waist to being able to do most normal shit now with just a bit of pain if I twist incorrectly.

 

I'm working on making it feel better via stretching and such.  In the meantime, I'm using my bike a lot more, 4-5 times a week consistently and even doing some of the yoga and strength routines they have as classes.  It's not powerlifting but it's something to keep my body active.  I love having the Garmin watch and being able to get a realistic idea of how many calories I'm actually burning.  It's always about 85% of what the bike tells me so the bike is surprisingly accurate (to me at least, I expected worse).

 

Food is hard right now.  I had been wildly undereating in volume and making up for it by eating trash that's high in calories.  So this adjustment to more volume but lower caloric density is wrecking my digestive system.  I've shit 4 times today so far and it's brown water.  I figure that'll subside a bit.

 

I also gained 4.2 pounds this week.  I'm not making a huge deal of that just because when I wake up, I still feel full as shit so I assume food volume more than anything else.  I'm not gonna act like a bitch and freak out and start eating 1400 calories as a result.  I'm gonna ride this shit out and see what starts to happen in the time window of months, not weeks/days.  Hell, I believe the book even says to not freak out after the first few days if you're new to eating like this.

 

Diet has settled nicely into 3 meals, around 12-1, 330-4 and 630-7.

 

meal one: ~14-20 oz lightly breaded chicken, half a plate of veggies (broccoli and cauliflower), a 2 scoop WPI shake in 8 oz milk, cottage cheese

Meal two: 3 rice cakes with peanut butter, same protein shake, some veggies like celery and humus

Meal three: ~1 pound of lean ground turkey, a bit of cheese, half plate of veggies, same protein shake, and whatever else I need to make the calories work (cottage cheese normally).

 

Macros are 50/25/25 P/C/F so if I need carbs, it's just some of those pre-prepared rice mixes like zatarain's, if it's fat, it's just peanut butter from the jar.  Normally it's carbs that are a bit short, with a little bit of fat.  If it happens to be protein, a glass of milk of whatever size is necessary.

 

Shit is not a great time so I feel @mwarren.  Intermittent fasting with 3400 calories is some kind of a cruel joke if you ask me and I can't imagine another 600/day.

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Diet looks good if a bit bland. It's possible the GI issues are connected to the protein shakes as some people don't handle them well. So keep that in mind if they don't subside. I use the same strategy with dieting: I eat a high volume of low cal veggies and try to limit the high cal carbs I eat. I have always been a volume eater and it's not the kind of habit one can break easily, so I just make sure to fill up on veggies. The key to maintaining sanity, in my case, is to put the veggies in a tasty sauce with lots of spices. I have three go-to sauces: indian curry, thai curry, and homemade tomato sauce. I can post recipes if you want.

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Protein shakes are a possibility, as are the FODMAP items on your meal list. Cruciforms can be hell on the gut. But, so can dairy...it's a brown water minefield; this diet. :) (BTW, what book are working from?)

 

Truth is, any meal that's not a convenience meal is a win-even if brown water is the result. 

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